No Underwear

So, this morning I opened my drawers and discovered the inevitable had happened: I was down to my last pair of jeans. They were my tightest, sexiest blackest jeans ever. It's so tight around the crotch, in fact, it hurts my you-know-what. It was unbearable to wear for long.

So, guess what I did?

I decided to wear no underwear today.

That's right.

No underwear and my sexy jeans.

God, I felt dirty today, strutting around Pacific Mall with my best friend. No one had a clue. At least I don't THINK so. There WAS one ackward moment when I had to shift a little because the coarse fabric were chafting something delicate...

Anyway.

So we went to mall today. We both got hair cuts. I'm not so pleased with mine this time.

Later we rode the subway back. It was late by then. It was a long ride, so started as usual into discussing miscellaneous philosophies. At one point Vince brought up one of our ongoing discussion questions: "What would you do if you knew tomorrow was the end of the world and everyone was going to die, but no one else did?"

This question has always been a little more than hypothetical to me, since I'm increasingly convinced that we are in fact reaching an environmental crisis. As soon as we reach a certain threshold, the ecological system we depend upon will inevitably collapse, and collapse rapidly, potentially within a few short decades. This would really mean the end of the world as we know it.

This time, however, he added a second question to the first: "What if you find out the next day that it isn't the end of the world?"

"How do you know that it isn't the end of the world afterall?" I asked.

"Well, for example, God tells you that tomorrow is the end of the world, but then tomorrow comes and nothing happens."

"Perhaps God has just decided to delay it by a day or two. Maybe it will happen the Day After Tomorrow."

"No, if nothing happens, then He's lying. And I won't believe Him ever again. I hate people who lie."

And then, all of a sudden the conversation became something else entirely for me. A felt a stab of anxiety. "Even if they lie just once?"

"Even just once. I'll hate them forever." One thing you have to know about Vince is that I've never known him to lie once in the years I've known him. I swollowed, my palms sweating.

"What if they're not exactly lying... just not telling the entire truth? Like they're hiding something."

He thinks about it. Then says, "If they're hiding? Then that's ok. I can understand that. If they decide not to tell me something... they're secret... family."

We lapse into a long uneasy silence.